"Spirited Cacophonies have Something Silent to Say"

Pen and Ink, two months of work. I was able to keep the rings close and consistent by finding my own method of measuring smooth circles using just an index card. I was away from my studio for the creation of this piece, so I had little to improvise with. 

Inspired by the works of Tyrus Wong and 2D hand-drawn cel animations like Bambi, the only proper way to execute this work was to attach a cel-sheet with the characters over a painted canvas background. Over the acrylic setting, the deer and rabbit are painted with nail-polish as it was the only paint I had access to that would stick to the cel sheet. They are painted from the back, so my layering process was done backwards.

The fourth painting after three failed attempts to capture the scene. I wanted a gentle yet unsettled feel, so I used acrylics to mimic oil paints. Just before the applied paint would dry, I would blend, smear and scratch it with my thumbs to get the texture. I tend to avoid greens, so using them in this painting lent to the lack of familiarity. My choice in this may have also been influenced by music at the time. The subject of the painting itself is not derived from an experience with synesthesia(photo), but I think the colors were closest to what I was smelling.

A highlight on loss of identity through dementia. 

"I am what I see and what I make."

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I do not agree with my face and voice. They have never been accurate representations of who I am. My hands are, of myself, what I see the most of and feel the most "me," along with my eyes. And eyes, being 'windows to the soul,' may be the only other proper representation of a human being.

I am an artist to the innermost fibers of my being, and my focus is always on creation, beauty and the 'essence of life.' I could observe over the course of many lifetimes, and yet I would be consumed in an endless pursuit to capture such life in my work as is held in just one eye. Yet to give unceasing attention to the creation of such a thing will be a forever chase in my lifetime. There would be nothing more appropriate in a self-portrait for me than my hands and eyes, merely appreciating each other. The observation and creation in this sense are nothing short than a form of love.

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Aside from illustration, the pencil holds a significance to myself as a poet. I appreciate written prose as it releases my serious pensive nature from the chains of my child-like voice. My words can become whatever is needed for the reader. Their interpretation may shift the emotional weight, tone, and possibly the overall meaning of the original thought, and through this connection to my work can in their own minds begin a conversation. My written word always feels closer to me than a spoken one.

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I chose a black-and-white, pen-and-ink look to honor my first decade with the arts. I illustrated with pencils and pens, nothing more. I became familiar and masterful with the element, and did not take up paint nor color until far later in my art career. I will always have a special connection to the ink and graphite. As for technique, I chose a blend of cross-hatching and stippling. I appreciate fine detail in illustration (and any art form) as it shows passion, patience, and love by the creator towards the work of their hands. To give enough time and attention to caring for details you may be the only one to notice is to love yourself and your work for the relationship between the two and for that sake purely. My art has saved me many times over and is the reason I go on many days, and so my work deserves such care. 

Mixed media on canvas.

Initially a digital artwork of which the file had been misplaced, this is a second version in acrylics and gouache.

Oil pastels on a toned paper.